Narcissists are grandiose, entitled people who seem convinced that they’re something special. They tend to lack empathy and are always seeking attention.
In extreme cases, someone might be diagnosed with ‘narcissistic personality disorder’. Despite the outward bravado, one theory about narcissism is that it’s often rooted in deep-seated insecurity, which is known as ‘vulnerable narcissism.’
There’s research to back this up – for instance, one brain scan study found that when narcissists looked at pictures of themselves, their neural activity was suggestive of negative emotion.
Another study found that narcissists had reduced connectivity between parts of the brain associated with the self and reward-related neural areas.
If attention-seeking and boastfulness are some narcissists’ ways of compensating for, or coping with, their private self-doubt, then a collapsed narcissist is someone for whom this strategy has gone badly wrong – perhaps the narcissist is rejected or publicly humiliated.
You won’t find the term ‘collapsed narcissist’ in psychiatry’s diagnostic manual, but it’s a term that some therapists and other psychologists use. A collapsed narcissist can be deflated and sometimes rageful.
One study that asked vulnerable narcissists to imagine being slighted, insulted or rejected found that they responded with feelings of sadness and self-loathing. Other research has found that collapsed narcissists often respond to provocations with shame, anger and rage.
It can be tempting to try to bring narcissistic people down a peg or two. But these findings suggest that this could risk conflict and worsen their underlying insecurities. A better route might be to try to help narcissistic people build a healthier source of self-esteem and develop greater empathy for others.
This article is an answer to the question (asked by Jules Morrison, via email) 'What is a collapsed narcissist?'
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